The State of Our Hearts
by mricj
Summary: On a torrential evening, Ellie and Riley decide to take a walk around the mall. Post-American Dreams and Pre-Left Behind.


**Author's Note:** **So, it's been a while. I've been having a lot of The Last of Us feels recently, especially when it comes to both Ellie and Riley, so, obviously, I couldn't keep myself from writing something fluffy for these two. They deserve it.**

 **Before you continue, I just want to let you know that there are a lot of American Dreams references here. It doesn't really matter whether or not you've read it before, but I seriously advise you to do it because these comics are really awesome and definitely one of the best ones I've ever read.** **And, it actually is part of canon.**

* * *

It had taken a while for Ellie to get used to living in Boston, but as the months passed and the seasons changed, the city seemed to have grown on her. Plus, having a friend like Riley by her side only made the whole process easier. The last time Ellie had a friend, a _real_ one, was back in Hartford; the girl's name was Lucia and the two of them were seven at the time, and as much as they loved spending time with each other—or as much time as they were allowed; growing up with the militaries meant endless classes and drills—the friendship didn't last long. After eight months into the military school, Ellie got expelled for stabbing another kid, an older chubby boy who was constantly picking on her for being one of the smallest children out of the whole school, with a compass. Not long after the incident, Ellie was sent to Denver and never heard anything about Lucia ever again, and honestly, she'd be surprised if the girl were still alive somehow.

Six years had passed since then, and Ellie had gotten used to being alone, had gotten used to always telling herself that that was probably for the best. Meeting someone like Riley after so long, someone that couldn't always understand her, but tried her best anyways, was like getting in touch with the little pleasures that life had to offer, as small as they were in a fucked up world like theirs. It was almost as if they shared some kind of _connection_ , and in a way, Ellie finally found somewhere—someone, actually—to call home, and their friendship had nowhere to go but uphill.

Stargazing quickly became one of the things both Ellie and Riley enjoyed doing the most while together. It had taken a while for Riley to admit it, but the main reason why, suddenly, she became so interested in stars, planets and different galaxies was because of Ellie; before that, Riley had never really paid any attention in it. She would never have imagined it, but it turned out Ellie was a huge nerd when it came to the subject, and it was nearly impossible to get away from the astronomy lessons whenever they climbed up the roof to watch the stars. More often than not, Riley would catch Ellie poking around the astronomy session when they visited to the mall's bookstore, always grabbing as much books as possible, and just like that, Riley found herself falling in love with it as well. Thinking about the stars, about the planets and the galaxies, always reminded Riley about how distant and untouchable they were and in a way, it was comforting. Somehow, it gave her hope for a better future.

("Y'know, we totally should go to the moon after surfing in Los Angeles," Ellie mumbled one night, arms wrapped around her legs and chin resting on her knees, only to earn a small chuckle from Riley, whom was lying on her back and _this_ close to falling asleep on the long forgotten rooftop, and Ellie couldn't help herself but smile lazily at the pleasant sound.

"We're doing that before or after we go window shopping in New York?")

But as enjoyable as stargazing with Ellie was, it couldn't be compared to sneaking out of the school and spending their time at the mall. There was something about the freedom that came with it, something about not having to follow any rules, about being whoever they wanted to be, not some robot the militaries had control over.

Most of the times, they would only sneak out so Riley could get something out of Winston, and eventually, the two of them would find themselves at the food court playing poker, since their water guns had been confiscated not much after they had their hands on them. Sometimes, Riley and Ellie would go the bookstore to check if they had missed anything last time they were there, only to end up disappointed. On those days, Ellie and Riley would pass through Raja's Arcade, and Riley always heard Ellie mumbling something about how lucky kids used to be back in the day and how much she wished to have a time machine.

At first, visiting the mall on a bleak night sounded like a good idea, but it wasn't until Ellie and Riley were outside that they realized how wrong they were. The cold air bit hard against their skin, and everything was silent; the only thing they could actually hear was the sound of the wind howling, leaving an uncomfortable feeling on their stomach. Both of them knew it was a matter of time until a storm, an ugly one, hit the city; a sign that the previous, _harsh_ winter still hadn't really left them. For now, though, all Ellie kept worrying about was about making out of the mall before it started raining and all hell broke loose.

"Riley, look," Ellie spoke loudly, excitement evident on her voice, as she pointed out to a bright yellow, and in Riley's opinion, rather extravagant, giraffe sweater. She had been living around the soldiers almost for years now, and as time passed, Riley learned quickly enough that relying on the Military for anything that wasn't food or shelter was pointless, and it wasn't until one month and a half after her first encounter with Ellie that she felt the need to replace the jacket that runner had ruined back when she and Ellie first met.

"You should take it," Riley mumbled, earning a nod from the other girl. She watched carefully as Ellie took the sweater off the mannequin and folded it neatly before putting the thing inside her backpack; the sweater was huge, and Riley didn't need to see Ellie wearing it to know it would look more like a dress than an actual sweater on her, and Riley couldn't help herself but smile thinly at the thought of how baggy it would be and how beautiful Ellie would look just then.

Shaking the thoughts off her head and the smile off her face, Riley walked further into the store, guilt forming itself in the pit of her stomach; she wasn't supposed to be thinking about her best friend in this way, was she? She wasn't supposed to be thinking about how whenever she made Ellie laugh, her heart would skip a beat at the sound, or how whenever Ellie looked at her, with fondness and admiration hiding behind her eyes, the palms of her hands would start sweating. For some reason, thought, thinking about Ellie as anything more than just a friend sounded wrong. Or, at least, wrong for _them_ ; romance didn't seem like one of the things that should be part of their world.

"Besides, this pink jacket you're wearing? It's got holes everywhere. Ever considered throwing it away?" Eventually, Riley found a plain turquoise snow jacket, and as much as it wasn't really her color, it'd have to do. For something that had survived almost twenty years in the apocalypse, it was in a nearly perfect condition. Unlike Ellie, Riley didn't think twice when it came to folding; instead, she just shoved the damn thing inside her backpack before getting up again and started heading towards Ellie's way.

"Well, just so you know, I think my jacket's still awesome," Ellie replied with no actual offense in her tone, instead, she was teasing just as much. Both of them stand in the jewelry section now, and out of the whole department store, that was the only place where everything actually looked untouched, almost as if the store was just closed, not abandoned. Well, that and the toys sections, but this time around, nothing had caught their attention. Not really, anyways. Ellie was wandering around the place aimlessly, going through as much things as possible. There was something amazing about the way people used to care about their image back in the day, something so fascinating that Ellie couldn't quite explain, and although she would never admit it, sometimes she wished she could have that too, even if it was just for a few hours; at some point, Ellie found a shooting star earring and for a moment, considered taking it—that, until she remembered her ears weren't even pierced, in the first place.

And it wasn't until then that Ellie saw it; a chain with a heart shaped pendant. Or, at least, Ellie thought it was supposed to be a heart. The metal used to be gold at some point, she knew that much, but after being exposed to the rain and air after twenty tears, it looked rusty more than anything else, and whatever the inscription read, Ellie didn't know—it was impossible to make out with the pendant missing its other half.

"I think this one's broken," Ellie mumbled softly under her breath, approaching Riley's form and showing it to her, "Well, guess I'll never find out what it says, then."

"Nah, I don't think so," As Ellie approached her, Riley offered her another chain with the same rusty gold color and the same heart pendant, except, this time, it was mirrored and the inscription was different. Riley put the two pieces together, and Ellie could finally understand that they were supposed to complete each other, "Ta-da! See? Two people're supposed to wear it. Just like engagement rings, but for friends instead."

"Oh, got it," With the two pendants together, Ellie took a closer look at it. It did seem like they were supposed to fit together, and suddenly, the memory of Riley telling her about how her parents used to wear engagement rings all the time no matter what they were doing occurred to her. Ellie didn't know that such thing existed for best friends, though, and she could feel a broad smile creeping up on her face, "Dunno, this is kinda cool. Think we should wear it."

"Ellie, are you proposing?" Riley teased, her voice five octaves higher than the usual, fighting—and miserably failing—to keep the laughter from escaping the back of her throat as Ellie's cheek and neck became scarlet red at the statement.

" _No_ ," Ellie found herself not teasing as much now, the playful tone completely gone from her voice, which just made the other girl laugh even harder, "Riley, I swear I can't stand you sometimes."

And it wasn't until Riley realized how serious Ellie was being that she stopped laughing so hard. For a moment, she almost felt bad for embarrassing Ellie _that_ much; almost, if it weren't so amusing to see Ellie like that, her face looking like a tomato just because of some words that were directed at her. Riley took the pendants in her hand again, inspecting them for a second time, and finally reading the inscription, "Are you serious, ' _partners in crime'_? Ellie, that's lame even for _you_."

"Fuck you, I'm not lame," Ellie was quieter this time, her voice a soft whisper, almost as if she wanted Riley, and Riley only to hear whatever she had to say, "I'm cool, sort of."

"Sure you are, babe," Riley didn't think twice before responding to Ellie's protests; there wasn't any irony there just the truth, and with that, Ellie felt special. Riley was pretty sure—no, she _knew_ —Ellie was, indeed, the coolest person she had ever met, even with her nerd kind of way. Even if Ellie didn't believe it with her heart; deep down, Ellie felt like if it weren't for Riley or Tino and the rest of the gang, people wouldn't even know who she was, let alone know her name.

Riley took the left half of the chain and eyed it again for the third time—guiltily, this time—before making her final decision and handing Ellie the right half. She put it around her neck, a ghost of a small smile touching her lips at the way the chain just hung in there, like it always belonged there. It felt special, like a promise. It was a promise that they would always be there for each other no matter what happened, even with Riley graduating and leaving the military school two years before Ellie. It was a promise that they would wait as long as it took, and neither of them quite understood how, in a matter of weeks, they became so close to each other. It almost felt like they had known each other their whole lives.

With the right half in her hand, Ellie put it around her neck as well, finally looking up at Riley. Ellie's eyes were shining now, and they were shining in a way that made Riley's heart beat faster and the butterflies dance in her stomach dance. Riley's ghost of a smile became broader this time, and before Riley knew it, she was taking Ellie's hands in hers and giving it a light squeeze before letting them go again and speaking softly, "C'mon, let's get outta here before this storm finally hits us."


End file.
